Odd Career Plan:

So being a military psychologist would probably be cool, because you could kill the people who are making your patients/clients upset.

I can't believe he posted that...

I find the word gumption to be hilarious because it sounds like a word for a disease involving lots of pooing.

A Challenge

I challenge all women under 25 to never use the word "amazing" to describe their friends, weekends, trips, whatever, unless they mean it. You are turning it into a cliched word and I am sick of it.

Stop.

Father's Day

Too busy with a paper to come up with my own joke for today. Have this instead, and like your father said, be grateful for it:

Senior Seminar

Paper: "Chess pieces can act in concert...."
Prof's note: "Can pieces "act"?
Me in class tomorrow: "Apparently you've never seen Harry Potter!"

Assassinating a Word

Did you know that "Assassination" spells Ass Ass I Nation? You'll
never look at it the same way again.

Look it up on Wikipedia....

Dean Windass was born on April Fools' Day, 1 April 1969 and grew up in Gipsyville, Hull. His parents, John and Doreen, divorced when he was thirteen years old.

Not a lucky kid, but he's in the premiereship now...

The Dark Side of the Toris

Doesn't "Shadow Children's Minister" sound really really creepy?

Narcissism

Twitter is for Tools. There, I said it.